The song is well put-together. Catchy, lyrics are well-written. , and the arrangement fits well. But as Sheylore said, I think the vocals are the weak link here. I think that possibly a voice that's a bit higher might sound better in the mix with the song. Have you tried singing in a higher key? Or, try double-tracking the vocals in the chorus...I think that might help make the chorus a bit more powerful.
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